What The F*ck Am I Doing?

What The Fuck Am I Doing?

When I started this blog I had high hopes. I had just come off a decade gig writing commentary on the ABC-TV soaps with several fan sites and life was full of our growing family and progressing life. I meant to use this as a platform for my television commentary, to discuss our burgeoning family, to tell you all about the fascinating things going on in the paranormal field. My life was an open book, public with nothing I felt I couldn't share.

A funny thing happened. The commentary that had always come so easily to me became a chore and I began to enjoy watching again without having to watch with an eye toward what I would write about it. ABC-TV went into the toilet when bought by Disney and they cancelled One Life To Live and All My Children. I continued to write, became a professional author when I was paid for articles submitted to the local newspaper, and moved on from the Daytime Game, but not from my love of General Hospital.

My family fell apart, quite literally, when the tight, close-knit unit we had all worked so hard to cultivate fell prey to people with no loyalty, no respect and no intention of allowing us to continue the extraordinary relationships we had with each other. Our beloved, adored grandchildren became pawns of grasping, hateful, sickening people who used them as bargaining chips, leverage and currency in personal vendetta's. Our trust was betrayed. Our hearts were broken. Whats worse is the ugly specter of illegal and unnatural drugs ruined otherwise decent peoples lives. The economy tanked, we gave up our mortgage; which turned out to be fraudulent, and moved into our 26 foot camper. Then my husband lost his long time job and we became gypsies when he started Gypsy Pipelining for the Teamsters.

The so called paranormal "field" I loved so much turned in to a laughing stock of untrustworthy circus performers posturing for the camera's. The media honed in on our little segment of the world and entertainment became the norm. Before we could adjust to ego running the show advances in technology have rendered photography, video and most EVP useless. Yet, the field is slow to acknowledge facts, which is why 90% of people in the field still wet their panties over orbs: which were proven NOT to be spirits a very long time ago. I really do not know if I even believe in investigating anymore, although I absolutely still believe in historical research.

So; back to the original question, what the fuck am I doing with this blog?

Right now I am going to use it as a travelogue. I am about to embark on a wonderful trip to Seattle, Washington courtesy of my big sister Virginia and her husband Rene and I want a place for my family and those close to me to keep up with my adventures. You are welcome to come along for the read.

Truth is still stranger than fiction and my life is still a testament to that fact. If you are ready, let's go.

Bendi

You want drama? I freaking GOT drama

My Life is a soap opera!

My youngest son just moved back into our house with his 11 year old son, of whom he has full time custody. This is my oldest grand child and he and I are very close. He is spoiled, oh Lord-a-jumping do I ever have him spoiled rotten, but he is also a good kid. He's troubled, though. My son and his mom were never married and he was born when they were both 17. The kid would have been lucky to survive if he'd been a dang puppy, you know? I love having them here, although hubby misses being able to run around the house naked. Not like I ever did that~ew~ or like he did it that much considering he works about 65 hours a week. (Or rather he is GONE TO WORK that long, actually working hours vary by the 30 pack), but I get his point. On those rare occasions when we do want to get our granparently-like freaky-deek on it will be more difficult to do with the house full of people, certainly.

The boy, our youngest son was named after the werewolf from Dark Shadows, Quentin Collins. Well we left off the Collins. LOL. I'm telling you this because it is only fair. There is a recurring theme to my daily life and the soaps have much to do with it.  Poor older son, Patrick James got stuck with the family names and has no cool soap tie-in. Adored middle son got the literary tie in, he was named after Katherine E. Woodiwiss's character Brandon Birmingham in The Flame & The Flower, the same as his brother-in-law born the same year. 

I digress, Quentin dropped out of school at 17 and went on a baby making spree. 3 women, 5 kids in Patrick Drake's 11 years. Yes, Patrick Drake is his real name GH fans and we chose it first, before they did! P.Drake-ity is the only one that lives with him/us at this point. His second son is an adorable 10 year old named Karson Hart whose biggest dramatic effect in our lives up to the age of 7 was that we didn't know he existed. Surprise. Daughter-in-law opens a letter in the mail one day and its a DNA request. He is most definitely OURS. We are getting to know him. I'd love to just scoop him up and smother him with the grandma love, but he is mildly Autistic so we are going at a rate that doesn't upset him.

The other 3 kids, with his soon-to-be ex wife are Brandon Tristan (Named after Tristan Rogers, Robert Scorpio on General Hospital) Myranda Lynn & Jenna Marie. I got to name Jenna. That's the name I would have named her dad if he'd been female. Soon-to-be Ex hid those three from us for 7 months when she decided to walk out on him. We have been getting to see them every other week for the last six weeks. She holds them for ransom, of course, but if he pays up when he is told to do so, then his children get to see him. Yeah, the courts are going to LOVE her and that is a date which is coming up real soon. I can't WAIT!

So, Q got his GED this year, thanks to his Uncle Billy who put a boot up his ass and wasn't taking no for an answer. It taught Q so much. He moved home last week and hit the ground RUNNING looking for work. AND he found it within a week. Its fast food, which isn't going to get Q and his kid out in a place of their own, but it is a start. He's at another interview for a better paying job right now. If he keeps up this dedication to purpose I know they will be great.

Why am I telling you this? Its a fucking blog, people. They are all about inane shit. Oh, yeah, WE GOT DRAMA. Between the parental kidnapping soon to be ex, the first baby momma (who will take HOURS to explain to you all) and the newest baby momma, who I think I'm going to like very much, the kids and their unique personalities (Myranda is a tiny diva,  Jenna reminds me of Drew Barrymore at 5, Brandon T is a sports phenom (I shit you not), Karson is so much fun getting to know us and P.drake's pre-teen angst) well, lets just say we got it going on up in here. Drama Central.

I need a beer. Who's with me?

I've done it now!

Okay so looks like I have a new blog. You're welcome.

Here I will discuss my family, which really is stranger than fiction. I'll talk about my obsession with television, daytime soaps & online fan things. I will talk about Missouri, the place I love, the home of my choice most of my life. I'll talk about the paranormal which is an everyday part of my existence. I may discuss ghost hunting, (I hate those TV shows!) we call them INVESTIGATIONS in the circles I run in; the supernatural, my big ass dog Lucy Coe (the Great White Pyrenees) and pretty much whatever else I am in to right now like what I'm reading, what I'm listening to and where we are partying at.

I don't expect this to blow up into any kind of media feast, but if your interested and think you can *handle* all the strangeness that is my life, then come along with me. You can be part of THE LONG, STRANGE TRIP that is my life.