What The F*ck Am I Doing?

What The Fuck Am I Doing?

When I started this blog I had high hopes. I had just come off a decade gig writing commentary on the ABC-TV soaps with several fan sites and life was full of our growing family and progressing life. I meant to use this as a platform for my television commentary, to discuss our burgeoning family, to tell you all about the fascinating things going on in the paranormal field. My life was an open book, public with nothing I felt I couldn't share.

A funny thing happened. The commentary that had always come so easily to me became a chore and I began to enjoy watching again without having to watch with an eye toward what I would write about it. ABC-TV went into the toilet when bought by Disney and they cancelled One Life To Live and All My Children. I continued to write, became a professional author when I was paid for articles submitted to the local newspaper, and moved on from the Daytime Game, but not from my love of General Hospital.

My family fell apart, quite literally, when the tight, close-knit unit we had all worked so hard to cultivate fell prey to people with no loyalty, no respect and no intention of allowing us to continue the extraordinary relationships we had with each other. Our beloved, adored grandchildren became pawns of grasping, hateful, sickening people who used them as bargaining chips, leverage and currency in personal vendetta's. Our trust was betrayed. Our hearts were broken. Whats worse is the ugly specter of illegal and unnatural drugs ruined otherwise decent peoples lives. The economy tanked, we gave up our mortgage; which turned out to be fraudulent, and moved into our 26 foot camper. Then my husband lost his long time job and we became gypsies when he started Gypsy Pipelining for the Teamsters.

The so called paranormal "field" I loved so much turned in to a laughing stock of untrustworthy circus performers posturing for the camera's. The media honed in on our little segment of the world and entertainment became the norm. Before we could adjust to ego running the show advances in technology have rendered photography, video and most EVP useless. Yet, the field is slow to acknowledge facts, which is why 90% of people in the field still wet their panties over orbs: which were proven NOT to be spirits a very long time ago. I really do not know if I even believe in investigating anymore, although I absolutely still believe in historical research.

So; back to the original question, what the fuck am I doing with this blog?

Right now I am going to use it as a travelogue. I am about to embark on a wonderful trip to Seattle, Washington courtesy of my big sister Virginia and her husband Rene and I want a place for my family and those close to me to keep up with my adventures. You are welcome to come along for the read.

Truth is still stranger than fiction and my life is still a testament to that fact. If you are ready, let's go.

Bendi

Let's talk about Daytime TV, Part I "Fan Sites"

First of all, I've been asked what happened to me? Why did I quit writing my column "The Daytime Diva's View from the Recliner's Edge" forr EYE ON SOAPS now All My Writer's? Why did I disappear from Daytime Confidential ABC Podcast? Well, I'll tell you, but it isn't very interesting gossip!

About 3 years ago the economy tanked and life at Casa Ache went to shit. We struggled to keep the TV turned on, and lost cable for MONTHS on end. I had no choice but to stop writing the column because I could not update it as needed. We went without phone service and without internet services off and on since then, too, so staying in touch with the soap community was impossible. Daytime Confidential has asked me to be on podcasts since then, but until recently I wasn't certain at any given time if we would have internet services. Since then, well, frankly I don't have the equipment on hand anymore to get in on the recordings. Seriously, the dog ate my headphones.

That's it. No drama. No soapy falling out, no underhanded diva's trying to silence my brilliance (LOL) I am pleased that Katrina (AMW) even invited me back to blog for her, and that Luke & Jamie have said the door is open when I'm ready to give them a shout and be their guest. This little blog here is NOT intended as any kind of competition for them, as if it could be! This is no comment on them or their sites, ownership, nothing like that. I'm good with all of them as far as I know (and if you heard any different; don't bother to tell me, ignorance is bliss & what I don't know ain't hurting me!). AMW & DC are my go to sites for all my soap information. I barely read any soap commentary from anywhere else. I highly recommend them if you don't read them already!

Yes, I miss my column. I miss my regular readers especially. Those few fans who followed me from the days I wrote for that scope place for "he who shall not be named". I'll admit it, but leaving the game freed me up in a way I didn't realize it would. I went from watching the shows with the agenda of getting something decent out of them for the column to old fashioned enjoying them again; for the most part. Being offline for the biggest part of 3 years was an eye opening (dead dog boring) experience. For one thing I went spoiler free and got my joy in watching the shows back. Please don't think I am dogging the spoilers sites or specific columns or any of that; I'm not. For me though, the lack of all that really gave me back, in large part, the viewing experience I had been missing. The months I spent without TV really brought home what a huge and loved part of my life, TV in general and daytime drama specifically really are.

If...when I do make commentary on the shows, it is not meant as any kind of competition for the sites of my colleagues. It is not commentary on their sites or their work. This blog kind of snuck up on me. What I like about it is that right now it is practically private, I have no deadlines and I can mother f*ck anyone anytime I please. I'm not going to reflect badly on people with good reputations or mess up any soapy relationships by telling you my feelings. Not that I ever did before or ever dealt with any censorship; I did not. My views are my own and do not reflect on any other person or entity.

Feel free to share the blog if you like it or lose the url if you don't. I will be telling you my feelings about the end of the shows and the back stabbing rat that is Disney, but I will be talking about my life and the drama of  it all as well as about the paranormal field and things that go bump in the night. The supernatural is a part of my every day life so it will be hashed.

Other things your going to hear about are that I believe Marijuana should be decriminalized and made legal for medical use (at least) and the plant should be available for use in its many diverse ways. If that offends you; I respect your opinion. Don't read me.

I'm also hating the fact that the bitches running our country are FORCING me to become some what political. I don't want to argue politics. I hate politics, but I'm on a rampage and those fat cat, rich bitches who think they are speaking for me have another think coming. I want a #cleanslate2012. Vote every sitting politician OUT who has not supported taxing the wealthy their fair share. That's my hot button topic, people. Why should the wealthy get breaks the real people do not? Why should those who can afford it the least have to carry the burden of taxation and the priviledge class just keeps getting richer off of us? Yeah. You'll hear about that from me too.

Feel free to comment, share, whatever. I marked this adult because I don't want to have to water down my words. if you repost and some young one is offended or traumatized it will not be on me, so share wisely.